athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)

Because he just came up in a conversation.
athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)
“Commander Vimes didn’t like the phrase ‘The innocent have nothing to fear’, believing the innocent had everything to fear, mostly from the guilty but in the longer term even more from those who say things like ‘The innocent have nothing to fear’.”

Terry Pratchett (via


athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)




Yet another reason I’m sad Terry Pratchett is dead is because I just know that the Discworld novel he would have written in response to recent developments in Britain and the world would be fucking scathing.

“A small but growing number of people believe we should magically summon a new world turtle and place Ankh-Morpork on its back in order to leave the Disc entirely, sir.”


“It can’t be done, sir. Especially not the…” Drumknott consulted his paperwork. “…bit where, and I quote, Obviously we’ll leave all the foreigners behind. They seem divided on the precise definition of foreigner but it seems to include anyone who doesn’t look like them, and most people who do look like them but speak funny.”

“Ah, we’ve reached that part, where we define foreigner so we know who to give the boot to,” Vetinari sighed. 

“It’s obviously not really plausible, sir, we’d lose a lot of good trade routes if there were no longer any external portions of the Disc attached to us, and having consulted with the alchemists there’s a strong sense among them that we would shortly run out of air to breathe should we leave the Disc’s protective weather systems.”

“Ah, but they can vote on it, you see,” Vetinari said. “They can campaign for it. And just knowing we ought to do it…”

He pulled a report across his desk, one in the crabbed, unmistakable schoolboy handwriting of Sir Samuel. “Crime is up, Drumknott.”

“I wasn’t aware we’d increased the Thieves’ Guild allotments this month, sir.”

“We haven’t. Nor the Assassins’ Guild. Unfortunately the crimes on the rise are of the go-back-where-you-came-from variety and there is, as of yet, no Bigots’ guild.”

“Do you think creating one would stop them, sir?”

“Not in this case, no,” Vetinari murmured. “I suspect we shall have to leave it up to human decency and the efforts of the Watch.”

Drumknott gave him the most horrified look he’d seen since the first time he suggested promoting Sir Samuel. 

“Not really, sir?”

“Of course not. Good lord, Drumknott. I shall have some errands for you today, however, and you’d best fetch the Commander. And Mr. De Worde. Get De Worde here first, then bring in Sir Samuel when he’s had just enough time to get nervous in the waiting room. If Sir Samuel is at home, do bring her Ladyship along, otherwise I’ll see her at the dinner tomorrow night. Ah yes, and I believe I shall pay a visit to Mr. Von Lipwig tomorrow afternoon; please notify him of the impending surprise inspection of the mint.”

“But sir, what will you – “

“That will be all, Drumknott,” Vetinari said.

In the crevices of Vetinari’s mind, gears began to turn. Disorder, of course, was a natural aspect of any city, but unpleasantness of this sort led to much too much and the wrong kind of disorder. After all, at one time Ankh-Morpork had simply been a swampy plain; trace a family back far enough and everyone was an immigrant. The kind of thinking that led to one saying they were taking their city and leaving sooner or later led to metaphorical shoving matches over who looked a little too igneous to be allowed, or whose mother sent funny food with them to school, or who exactly was allowed to wear what kind of cloth on their head. 

And the whole thing, as he knew from personal experience, could very well lead to unpleasantly large dragons. 

Perhaps it was time to set some spinning tops in motion. 

@copperbadge – what would we need to pay you so you could write that book … :) ?? 

I might already have written an outline. It includes a Star Wars allegory and the phrase “vimes joins the resistance”, also “the return of our beloved long-fingered despot”.
athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)







I dunno if y’all are following the official Terry Pratchett page on facebook or not but ever since the US election results came out they’ve been posting text images like these:

[Quote: “Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show.”]

and honestly the thought of Terry Pratchett throwing shade from beyond the grave is all that’s keep me going some days.

I saw one comment from saying something along the lines “well you shouldn’t post this, you don’t know how he’d feel about it”

No. If you read ANY of his books it’s clear how he’d feel about this nonsense.

I saw those comments and laughed my ass of because Terry was, and remains, a bastion of righteous rage and hope in a world weakened by fear and hatred. He told us plainly, Suffer Not Injustice—to take light into dark places and to care for those in need, not because it is kind or good but because it is right.

He’d be going absolutely fucking SPARE if he were alive to see the world as it is today. And
I don’t just mean over the US elections, I mean Brexit, I mean
Aleppo—the whole god damn world—he’d be going utterly Stoneface-I can’t be having with this-Librarian Poo.

And he’d damn well do something about it too.

NGL there’s been a 3rd thought in the back of my head when I’m wondering if I’m doing enough and if anything I do matters that whispers with wide-eyed horror–

“–but Terry Pratchett would go SPARE.”

The only upside to 2016 is that Pterry may in fact resurrect out of pure, unbridled rage.

“And ANOTHER thing…”

lately I am constantly reminded of the conversation between Granny Weatherwax and Mightily Oats in Carpe Jugulum:

“It’s not as simple as that. It’s not a black and white issue. There are so many shades of gray.”“Nope.”“Pardon?”“There’s no grays, only white that’s got grubby. I’m surprised you don’t know that. And sin, young man, is when you treat people like things. Including yourself. That’s what sin is.”“It’s a lot more complicated than that–”“No. It ain’t. When people say things are a lot more complicated than that, they means they’re getting worried that they won’t like the truth. People as things, that’s where it starts.”“Oh, I’m sure there are worse crimes–”“But they starts with thinking about people as things…”
athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)
via 1, Night Watch, Terry Pratchett - BBC Radio 4 Extra:


16 Days left (as of 8/19/16) to listen to episode 1 of the BBC Radio adaptation.
athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)

The Discworld Emporium really put this actual plaque on the wall outside the shop and I am so ridiculously thrilled about it.


athousanderrors: from 'Spirited Away' - soot sprites, clutching confetti stars, running about excitedly. (Default)

September 2017

      1 2
3 4 5 6 7 8 9
10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 2223


RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 23rd, 2017 03:57 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios